Starting Out in the Evening by Brian Morton

Author:Brian Morton
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Houghton Mifflin Harcourt

She finished the thesis on a Saturday afternoon in early April. At almost 200 pages, it looked lean but substantial. She knew it was only a draft; she knew she had more work to do on it. But it was an accomplishment.

She had managed to finish it just a few days before her twenty-fifth birthday, which was the goal she’d set when she’d begun.

When she’d begun her project, she was so in love with Schiller’s first two books that she felt confident that she’d eventually find a way to love his last two. But it hadn’t happened, and the manuscript she’d produced would hurt him, which was the last thing she ever would have wanted to do. She believed in the worth of what she had written, but she was aching with a sense of her own disloyalty.

And now the hardest part was coming. Weeks ago, she had told Schiller she’d show him the manuscript when it was done. He hadn’t even asked to see it—she’d volunteered. And now she felt she had to show it to him.

She was afraid it would kill him.

Well, it wasn’t all her fault. It was Schiller’s fault too. Because he had changed. If he had kept the flame of his life alive, then she wouldn’t have had to write about him like this.

She took out the photograph of Schiller that she’d stolen on the day they’d met. She studied it closely. The young Schiller: laughing, bright with youth, bright with arrogance.

“I love you,” she said to the photograph. “Where are you?”

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